Hello all -
In light of Dave Chapelle's absence from, well, everything...I'm christening my first blog as the 2nd Racial Draft. The statistics and decisions have been based on an analytical approach from thorough research regarding the subjects' recent tendencies.
I'm just going to jump right into it with our First Round Draft Pick.
The Chinese people have selected Rob Murray! They have dubbed him with a new last name due to pronunciation difficulties....
(p.s. - click on the photos for a larger version)
He has been chosen due to:
-his hatred of Taiwan & Tibet
-pokes Mao on Facebook constantly
-his pronunciation of the letter "L" is slowly but surely forming into an "R"
-thoroughly enjoys censorship and repulsively greased-up Chinese food
________________________________________________________
Round 2: This draftee is famous for not being famous (anymore). She's vicariously famous due to the incessant female readers of People and US Wee-iiii don't give a fuck. Regardless, the only way she is relevant to the The Duplex is her recent choice of creed:
The self-titled "Chosen People," have drafted Britney Spears!
__________________________________________________________
Round 3, yo: This character is close to all our hearts, but he has been distancing himself this summer due to his counterproductive service to his community that is Long Beach, NY.
Our 3rd Draftee is part of The Crime Family (yes, this is for real). They have recorded multiple tracks in a "friend's" studio.
The Black Community selects...Jonah Corwin!
The chart-topping track that we (will) all know is called "Late Night Text".....check it out, and listen for Jonah spit hot fire with his suave New York accent halfway through the song:
[video has been taken down by request]
PEACE
No comments:
Post a Comment